My baseline

Baseline (noun): An imaginary line or standard by which things are measured or compared.

Something new has been brewing and I desperately need to articulate it. The best phrase I’ve come up with to describe it is that my happiness baseline feels steady and straight. The word baseline is normally found in research literature and refers to a starting point of data to ‘base’ further research from. A baseline is a standard to which everything else is compared to.


Over the last few months, I have noticed my happiness baseline is consistent and unwavering. It does not appear to change. The best thing about this baseline is that it is 1) being sustained and 2) being created by only me. Nobody else. I have reached an imaginary line of contentment that no one else can alter. External factors which may (or may not) add peaks and valleys to my happiness will measure up against this self-defined, internal baseline that does not move. This, for me, is quite revolutionary.

The old me would have had a fluctuating baseline of happiness dependent on all external forces. Namely, whether or not I was in a relationship and if I was being validated by someone else’s love and attention. It was also dependent on what other people were doing around me, and how I viewed my life in comparison to theirs. But because I’ve spent so much time (happily) on my own these last 2 years, I have arrived at a place whereby I don’t need my self-worth to be wrapped up in other people’s views, emotions, choices, opinions or lives. This simply does not matter as much.

If lovers choose to come or go, if jobs come or go, if friends choose to come or go, if funding comes and goes, etc., I know, deep down, that I’ll be perfectly okay. This feels pretty great. The fact that I am completely responsible for my own happiness is not only liberating, it is exciting. I have been able to remain unattached to the world around me in a way that I never thought possible.

Join me in creating your individual happiness baseline. See things and others around you as merely additional research that cannot touch the years of life data and self-love you have already built.


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